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Advice on How to Seduce Women
 There are a zillion articles on how to seduce women. There are
that many books on how to impress a Woman. But how, really, do
you get her attention, keep her attention, and make her come
back for more of the wonderful you? Do you follow the men’s
versions of The Rules, that say you wait x number of times,
you avoid a, b, c, and you be sure to always do d, e, and f?
Do you follow the special advice on how to seduce women who
are hot or who are rich? Do you go with the psychology of
genders, and follow the generalizations that all girls want
Brad Pitt, all women are on diets, and all girls love to shop?
If you do try to abide by the rules of any of the above,
aren’t you eliminating a number of options to meet and maybe
get involved with a woman who loves cars and can drop an
engine, rebuild it, and replace it in three weeks? Won’t you
be leaving out the women who have no money but are potential
money-makers as they are working two jobs and taking classes
at night to become a veterinarian or a geologist?
You get the idea. Following some (I said “some”) advice on how
to seduce women might in fact have the opposite effect: you
may gross her out (if she’s not like the girls targeted in the
how-to-seduce-women-manual) when you were trying to intrigue
her, you may make her laugh when you intended to make her
swoon, or you may make her scream when you meant to make her
giggle or laugh.
So how about this? How about following a few righteous and
fair methods that work almost every time because you weren’t
working at them or weren’t working her?
Be real. And realistic. You say one lie (that you are
bold-faced aware you are saying), and you have just changed
the game. You now have to keep track of the lie, never forget
it, and know that that lie is what part of your potential
relationship is now based on. For she will believe you. And
one day, if you are both lucky enough to get involved, she
will find out. And she will dump your ass. Or do a LOT of
haranguing and how-could-yous….
In the same respect as you will be yourself—nervous if you are
nervous (some girls find that adorable); clumsy if you are
clumsy (some girls find this endearing)—you will also remember
that the girl you seek to impress might not be the one for
you…no matter how close a next-door neighbor she is or how
many years you all went to the same football games and movies.
Do not bother “bartering above your station” if she is not the
type to date your type.
Be confident and self-reliant. Don’t think yourself unworthy
of every woman who walks into study hall, either. Try, please,
TRY to strike a healthy balance between “Ah, me,” (ala Eyore)
and the cock of the walk. We do not know how to handle either
of you. WE don’t know what to do with a whimpering one—other
than play armchair psychologist—and we don’t know how to act
around an egotist—other than to giggle NERVOUSLY, as in DANGER
to our self-preservation instincts, which are telling us to
run.
Be interesting and interested. Have interests other than guns.
Talk about something besides your Nazi swastika collection. In
fact, if you are a skinhead or neo-Nazi, you may have other
things on your mind besides how to seduce women. So ignore
this article, won’t you? When you ask her questions, for God’s
sake—or yours—LISTEN to the answer. Don’t look at her boobs.
Don’t keep saying uh-huh. Uh-huh. Uh-huh. Interact.
Be healthy. The studies show that we are attracted to the body
and face that represents the optimum reproductive abilities
and features. That is, white teeth, symmetrical shapes, etc.,
are not consciously sought after but certainly part of the
search. Brush, bathe, shave, etc.. And smell good. Whatever
that means.
Be fair. Do not put her on some Madonna (or Madonna/whore
combo) pedestal. She is not Angelina Jolie. She is not your
mother. She won’t make love to you forty times a week. She
won’t cook for you or jump up from her studies to do the
dishes if you demand it, expect it, or insist that Mommy
always did it for you. If you are just meeting her, don’t tell
her how much you adore your mother or how many nights a week
Mom comes along on dates with you. In fact, if you’re an
actual Mommy’s Boy, don’t even bother reading this.
And be positive. You don’t have to fake joy and sunshine and
lollipops if your favorite pet just died, but try to see
something good in every person you meet, not just the one that
your biology cannot ignore. Try to see, especially, some good
in yourself. Smiling and jokes are often great bonding
mechanisms. So is “Hello.” |
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